FROM AN UNKNOWN AUTHOR
I did not write this, but I think that it is very funny.
A man buys a brand new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500 that comes complete with 4-wheel drive, and monthly payments of $560. It is the first weekend in January and all the lakes are frozen so he and a friend decide to take it on a duck hunting expedition. These two guys drive out onto the lake ice with guns, their hunting dog, some beer, and of course the new Lincoln Navigator.
Now, they want to make some kind of a natural landing area for the ducks, something on which the decoys will float. They want to make a hole in the ice and in order to make a hole large enough to entice something like a wandering duck; it is going to take a little more than a standard ice hole drill can provide. The owner of the new Navigator reaches in the back of his car and produces a stick of dynamite with that has a 40-second fuse.
Now these two Rocket Scientists do take into consideration that they want to place the stick of dynamite on the ice at a location far from where they (and the new Navigator) are located. They did not want to take the risk of slipping on the ice running from the burning fuse and possibly go up in smoke with the resulting blast.
They light the 40-second fuse and throw the dynamite.
Remember earlier when I mentioned a 4-wheel drive vehicle, a beer, some guns, and a dog? Great, then let’s focus on the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING THINGS–especially things thrown by its owner.
You probably already guessed that when the dog saw the stick of dynamite being thrown by his owner he took off at a high rate of speed on the ice to dutifully retrieved the stick of dynamite–the one with the burning 40- second fuse.
The two men yell, scream and wave their arms in panic and wonder what to do now. Of course, the dog, cheered on by the antics of the men keeps coming so one of the guys grabs the shotgun and shoots it. However, the gun is loaded with only #8 shot, hardly large enough to bring down a hefty Black Lab. Slightly dazed and clearly confused, the dog does stop for a moment but then quickly resumes his course back toward the men. Another shot and this time the dog, still standing, becomes very confused and is now terrified as well. It is also thinking that these two geniuses have gone insane, and favoring self-preservation, it alters course to find cover. Where, I hear you ask. Yep, it hides under the brand new Navigator as the now very short fuse on the stick of dynamite continues to burn. BOOM!… Dog and Navigator are blown to bits and what’s left of both sink to the bottom of the lake in the resulting hole created by the blast as the two “Rocket Scientists” stand there with an “I can’t believe this is really happening” look on their faces.
The insurance company assures the hapless owner of the Navigator that sinking a vehicle in a lake using illegal explosives is clearly not covered in his insurance policy, and at the same time they also inform him that his first payment of $560 is due in 10 days!
So now how do you feel about the way your day is going?